OK... I can hear it now ... the cries of "Your an alarmist!!" or "You want to live in an 'Ozzie and Harriet' world!" or even (as no doubt you bleeding-heart liberals will shout) "Your a bigoted, racist, NAZI!!"
Well it doesn't matter to me what you think of me or say about me. Because I know that I'm right. And those of you who disagree with my 'truth' know deep down inside that I'm right. There are those of you who want to stick your heads in the sand (An excellent way to get your ass shot off, by the way...) and deny that the points and facts I bring up are true. That's fine. You can come to / live in this tattered hell-hole all you want. As for myself, I'm gonna get out of here just as fast as I can!

Now there is probably a good portion of you that agree with me because you know I'm right, and may be asking yourself right now, 'Just what in the hell AM I still doing here??' or ' Why in the hell would I even want to go to such a place??'

For those here .... The only thing holding you back from getting the hell out is FEAR. Well, you can either live with the fear of the unknown by leaving, or the fear of knowing what can happen to you if you stay. You may say, "But I've got a good job, and a nice house .... I can't just throw it all away!" Well, I've been saying the same thing to myself for the last 15 or so years also. And I'm coming to realize that the stress alone, from just being in this cesspool is killing me. OK, so you've got your bitchin' job, and your nice big house, and a couple of cool cars parked in the garage .... but at what price? A rose stuck into the middle of a big pile of shit, is STILL a rose stuck into the middle of a BIG PILE OF SHIT. Contrary to what most 'Angeleno's' think, there IS a whole big world outside of Los Angeles and California! Why, there are people who live in every single state we have! Imagine THAT! And if they can manage to live outside of L.A. ... so can YOU. If you are too afraid to do something about your situation, then you had just better be ready to put up with a lifetime of misery. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Now if you really believe that this dump is just a WONDERFUL place to live .... man, your just one blind, stupid, FOOL ....

For those of you who are thinking, or worse yet, planning on either visiting here, or living here .... DON'T!! Whatever 'pot at the end of a rainbow' you think your going to obtain here is just a pipe-dream! Everything you've read on the previous pages are true, and don't let anybody tell you it's not! As my dad used to tell me "A word to the wise is sufficient" ...

Many of you have emailed me asking "Well... why in the hell do you stay here then?" Just so I don't have to type this over and over again, this is why.... When I bought my house in the summer of 1989 it was a "seller's market". (Remember when people used to camp out on the sidewalks for days at a time just for the opportunity to bid on a house whenever a new housing track opened up?) At the time, I paid $XXX,XXX for my house. It is now worth $30,000 - $40,000 less than what I paid for it. I could do one of two things. I could just "walk away" from it.... if I want to destroy my credit for the next 7+ years, and get sued by my mortgage company. Not a very good option. Or I could "short-sell" the house. Unfortunately, somehow or other, the Govt and the IRS figures that I somehow MADE $30,000 - $40,000 profit on the house (yeah... show me the money!) and will get taxed on that as earned income. This is another financial 'hit' I can't afford either. (I may want the hell out of here, but I'm not stupid either!) So... in the meantime, here I sit with this freekin' ball and chain locked firmly to my ankle. I'll have to just wait a few years until I can at least break even selling the house, or win the lottery ... whichever comes first.

I've been in L.A. waaaay too long!

This Awful City
l y r i c s
This Awful City Words by Jack Hastings, Music by Jack Hastings and dRAW PiNKY ©1997 j hastings, draw pinky

The sun of Los Angeles weighs upon the smoking sky Burns through long-buried memories And Im driving down Traction Street, past the American Hotel Lying empty in the sullen summer silence And I could not imagine that a face in the window Could be heavy with such harsh and broken meaning But my heart is a traitor and my mind is a fool And my soul is an urn filled with ashes And all the pretty women whisper from behind their painted lips There is no love in Los Angeles That night up in Griffith Park, standing near the telescope I thought I heard the city sigh with longing And I thought I heard the children weeping Their childhood stolen by hopelessness and anger and bullets Dialed your number on a pay phone and I spoke to your machine I thought Id ask but it had no easy answers Youd left me from the inside out, left me here with all my doubts Left me standing here in your shadow And all the graffiti splashed across the stucco walls reads There is no love in Los Angeles And Im dreaming of annihilation, dreaming of extinction Let the earth crack and swallow up this place Let the fire from the mountains sweep across the boulevards And let the sea retake this awful city There is lust and desire and the currency of flesh But there is no love in Los Angeles There is no love in Los Angeles

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